Author Topic: HUMOR - Old Cemeteries Sayings  (Read 589 times)

Offline Antus67

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HUMOR - Old Cemeteries Sayings
« on: April 03, 2018, 05:22:14 pm »
Some fascinating things on old tombstones!

Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York:
Born 1903--Died 1942.
Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the
car was on the way down. It was.
=============================
In a Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery:
Here lies an Atheist, all dressed up
and no place to go.
=============================
On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in
East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia:
Here lies Ezekial Aikle, Age 102.
Only the good die young
=============================
In a London, England cemetery:
Here lies Ann Mann, who lived an old maid
but died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767
=============================
In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery:
Anna Wallace
The children of Israel wanted bread,
And the Lord sent them manna.
Clark Wallace wanted a wife,
And the Devil sent him Anna.
============================== =
In a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery:
Here lies Johnny Yeast.
Pardon him for not rising.
============================== =
In a Uniontown, Pennsylvania, cemetery:
Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake,
Stepped on the gas instead of the brake.
==============================
In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery:
Here lays The Kid,
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger,
But slow on the draw.
============================== ==
A lawyer's epitaph in England:
Sir John Strange.
Here lies an honest lawyer,
and that is Strange.
============================== ===
John Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne, England, cemetery:
Reader, if cash thou art in want of any,
Dig 6 feet deep and thou wilt find a Penny.
============================== ====
In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England:
On the 22nd of June, Jonathan Fiddle went out of tune.
============================== ====
Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls, Vermont:
Here lies the body of our Anna,
Done to death by a banana.
It wasn't the fruit that laid her low,
But the skin of the thing that made her go.
============================== ====
On a grave from the 1880s in Nantucket, Massachusetts:
Under the sod and under the trees,
Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.
He is not here, there's only the pod,
Pease shelled out and went to God.
============================== ====
THIS ONE IS EXTREMELY WELL WRITTEN:-
In a cemetery in England:
Remember man, as you walk by,
As you are now, so once was I.
As I am now, so shall you be,
Remember this and follow me.
To which someone replied by writing on the tombstone:
To follow you I'll not consent,
Until I know which way you went.

And the final one...
On a tombstone in Boothill Cemetery, Tombstone, Arizona:
Here lies Lester Moore
Four slugs from a 44
No Les, No more
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Offline acooldozen

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Re: HUMOR - Old Cemeteries Sayings
« Reply #1 on: April 05, 2018, 06:38:10 pm »
Thanx for the chuckles!
.........and make yourself a Great Day! Cheers, Lyle